The Bachelor – Sad Story Contest

sean the bachelor roseA second two hour episode of The Bachelor in two days?  Where is the ACLU when you need them?  This has got to be some kind of a violation of our human rights to put this show on for four hours in one week.  I read a story about this show being played for prisoners at Guantanamo Bay and after just one episode, they all signed a petition asking to be water boarded instead.  The Army was confused because they didn’t think they were torturing them with this show.  Hardened terrorists can’t handle this show but here I am.  A true professional.  Watching The Bachelor for you dear reader.  My sacrifice is great.

So lets get in to tonight’s episode.  The theme of tonight’s episode seemed to be “tell Sean a sad story to get a rose.”  Last week, I mean last night, Tierra felt that she was in danger of going home so she quickly had to tell Sean a sad story from her childhood to get his sympathy and get a rose.  Her plan worked and Jackie got sent home.

Obviously the other women figured out Tierra’s strategy and recognized that Sean, while saying that he doesn’t like drama, in fact loves drama very much and seems to view himself as the savior of all things female.  Tell Sean a sad story, and he will be unable to resist the urge to be your savior.  The women are on to it and every one of them had some kind of sad story to tell him tonight.  A normal man (me) would have been searching for a cyanide pill to chew on after the first one on one.  Remember when Ted from Airplane bored passengers to death with his stories?  That’s how I felt watching this play out.

tierra the bachelor cryingWhat episode of The Bachelor would be complete without a Tierra incident?  Even though she is only 24, Tierra is obviously a very skilled manipulator of men.  She has had some kind of accident in nearly every episode it seems and it always necessitates Sean coming to the rescue to save the damsel in distress.  The other women see right through what she is doing which is part of why they all hate her so passionately.  Sean of course doesn’t see her other side and even if she slapped him in the face with her crazy, he is so enamored with saving her that it probably wouldn’t matter.  One of our readers, Midwest Melissa, has said from the beginning that Tierra is the craziest of all the women on the show and she is being proven right week after week.

sarah herron the bachelorThe first woman eliminated tonight was 26 year old advertising executive Sarah Herron.  What was funny about this elimination was that Sean thought he was doing her a favor and that he was man enough to eliminate her as soon as he knew he wasn’t going to give her a rose.  Yes.  Very chivalrous of you.  Instead of elimination at the Rose ceremony, let me single you out from the group outside of the normal flow of things and take you out in the hall and shoot you in the head.  I’m sure Sarah appreciates it looking back that Sean saved her from one more day of fake dates but at the time, she didn’t seem too happy with his decision.


Eliminated in the rose ceremony

selma alameri the bachelor29 year old real estate developer Selma Alameri.








daniella mcbride the bachelor24 year old commercial casting associate Daniella McBride.







We have had 5 women eliminated in 2 very long days leaving us just 6 potential winners and 5 potential future Bachelorettes.  Right now, I think Tierra is the favorite.  The more the women try to tell Sean how crazy she is, the more it will push him towards her.  She has figured out how to win Sean over and right now, her plan is working to perfection.

That’s what I think but I want to know what you think.  So tell me America, who do you think is going to win this season of The Bachelor?  Be sure and let me know.

If you are interested in watching this train wreck, The Bachelor airs on ABC Mondays at 7:00 and apparently several more times during the week as well.  It’s seriously on more than American Idol which up until this week, I would have thought wasn’t possible.


3 Comments on The Bachelor – Sad Story Contest

  1. Midwest Melissa // February 6, 2013 at 8:16 am //

    Dear Sean,
    I need you to understand why I am the way I am and couldn’t come on the show. You see, when I was a child, my parents abandoned me in a dark forest. My only friend for years was a bunny rabbit, and then it scratched my arms while I was trying to give it a hug and jumped off a cliff. For years, I didn’t leave my cave. When I emerged, I met a charming dwarf and we fell in love. I was devoted to him, but even though I was totally hot and not crazy, he cheated on me with a band of fairies, and then left me because I was too tall. I was devastated. Shortly after, a fire swept through the forest and destroyed my home, and then pterodactyls descended from the sky, and one of them pecked my toes off. I can no longer wear my platform high heel shoes; a crushing blow. So, you can see why it’s hard for me to trust men, and why I tread lightly and appreciate life and want to have a family of my own.

    So, I was wondering, will you put on your cape, fly to my cave, and marry me???

    All my love,
    Damsel N. Distress

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